End of 2020...

 I have not been on here since the beginning of the year. I can't believe I ave gone the whole year without writing anything. This year has been horrible with Covid. I haven't been to my part time job since March and i actually miss it. I miss the excitement of a lot of people around. I still do not know when things will go back to normal. I am ready for it to. I feel like I can't do anything. One of the main things that I wish I could do is volunteer. I haven't had the chance to do it this year because of Covid and hopefully once this thing is finally over I can start again. Another thing I am looking forward to is going to church. I do not know how long it has been since I have been and I have been watching the live streams every Sunday and Wednesday and I can't wait until I can physically be there and become active. 

The fall semester is over and I am glad it is over. Out of the four classes I have taken, I have to retake one which is statistics. I am not a math person. I am taking the spring semester off and will continue either in the summer or fall. I am almost done. I only have a few classes left until I can graduate and I can not wait. It has been a long time I have been in school forever and it will feel great to finally finish something. For now, I am working on getting certifications. My plan is to get 5 certifications by the end of next year. 

I just had a job interview the other day for a night job. The interview wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be because I always get nervous. I feel like I never know what to say or I feel like I answer questions wrong but we'll see if I get the job. I would be shocked if I do but it will be nice to have the extra income. The only thing is its a night job and if I get it I hope I will have some support when I need to work. 

It is the end of the year and I am still SINGLE. I have been single for almost 7 1/2 years and I realize that every New Year i hope that it will be my year to finally find love and then the end of the year comes and I am still single like I was at the beginning of the year. Why does finding love have to be so hard? I can't believe I have been single this long. Maybe 2021 will be my year to finally find love but I wouldn't hold my breath since I have been saying it for years and every year I am still single. I honestly feel like I am losing hope on finding love and the man of my dreams. I'm sure it will happen one day but it is taking a long time. Who knows maybe there isn't a loving, sweet, honest, caring, funny man out there for me and that's why he hasn't came into my life. I feel like I just need to get use to being alone which I obviously am use to it. Maybe I am better off alone because if I were to ever get in a relationship I do not think I would even know what to do. I am so out of touch when it comes to dating and relationships I would be scared that I would ruin it.

First post of the year...

This is my first post of the year. It will officially be March tomorrow. So far this year I have been enjoying taking this semester off from school. It just amazes me how much free time I have when school isn't involved because between work and school I never have time to do anything. I am out of school until the summer. I will be back in May so I have at least two and a half months to enjoy. Once I go back then all my free time will be over for the next year. I will miss it but if I can get through the next school year then I should be graduating in the Spring. I can't believe how close to graduation I am. I'm scared I'm going to screw up somewhere and end up having to take a class over and then I won't be graduating in the Spring. I just hope this time off helps me to be able to focus once I start back. I just want to officially finish and be done.

I kind of feel like it is time for me to find another job. I have been doing my job for almost 4 years and I feel like its time to find something else to learn. Plus my job isn't the same anymore. Its amazing how so much can change in less than a year. We have lost so many employees I feel like I will be the next one. I have applied to three jobs in my company and if I am offered one of them then I will probably take it. I like my job but I feel like it is time to move on. I just hope they can find someone to replace me since I'm the only one who does my job. Who knows what will happen but we'll see if I'm even still working there come the end of this year.

Last post for the year..

I can't believe today is the last day of 2019. This year hasn't been all too bad. I wonder what next year holds. I hope 2020 will be a good year. I'm going to work on trying to be healthier, save money, volunteer more, read more, get closer to finishing school, and if I'm lucky I might meet the love of my life. All I want is to find a man who is as interested in me as I am with him, someone who can get me out the house and have some fun every once and a while. I am such a homebody. All I do is go to work and come home. It would be nice to have a little excitement going on in my life. We'll see how 2020 works out when the end of it comes around. Will things still be the same for me or will a change happen? We'll see what happens...

Figured it out...

I think I have my school situation figured out. I'm going to have to miss out on this Spring semester but that will take me from three to two semesters until graduation. I think the best thing to do is to relax and enjoy this semester off. Finish paying the semester off and get back in to classes in the Summer. I'm planning on taking three classes this Summer and hopefully I'll pass then I will have three classes left to take for both the Fall and Spring semester as well as the internship then I should be graduating that is if I don't fall behind financially again or have to retake any classes. So I should still be on track with graduating next Spring. I'm nervous and anxious. I am ready to be done.

New Year goals...

Since the New Year will be here soon. There are two goals I want to accomplish in the New Year. One is to start volunteering more. I think I only volunteered once this year and I think it is because I didn't know where to volunteer but luckily on my school site they have a list of places to volunteer and I have found two places that I am interested in volunteering at so my goal is to try and volunteer once or twice a month depending on how much PTO I have that I can use. The second goal is to read more books. I am always so busy or tired that its been awhile since i have had time to read but since school has been out and I can read books for free through the library app on my phone, I have read two books so far in the past week and I am on my third. I forgot how nice it is to relax and read a book. Hopefully I can continue to do it but who knows if I have to miss out on this school semester I will have plenty of time to read.

Year almost over...

The year is almost over. Christmas has come and gone and it will be 2020 next week. I made it another year without getting a boyfriend. It's still hard to believe that I have been single for 6 1/2 years. Every time a new year comes around I always hope that it will be the year that someone finally comes into my life then the end of the year comes without it happening then I say we'll see what happens next year. Maybe 2020 will be my year or I will be saying this exact same thing this time next year.

I made it through the Fall semester. A B, C and C+. I wish I was one of those people who could get straight As but I'm just glad I passed the classes one of them especially since this was my 4th time taking it and this time I had a different teacher than the other three times so I'm convinced the teacher was the problem. I only have three semesters to go then I can finally graduate. I'm so close to being done but I think I'm going to have to sit out this Spring semester because I was unable to finish paying for the rest of the semester. I still owe $2,000+ dollars and if I can't pay I can't register for the semester. I have tried since the semester started to get the money but have had no luck and I don't know what to do. I'm trying to figure out my classes if I have to skip this semester and I am stumped. I am having a hard time figuring out how its going to work. I just wish I could find a way to get this money and not derail my plans. I have tried numerous times to get a loan but no one will give me one. I have tried to get a job which I did get a part time job but I'm not getting paid enough to pay off $2,000 but I'm still looking for another job. I literally have no idea what to do. I feel like every time I try to take 2 steps forward I have to take 10 steps back. I need a miracle to happen but I don't think it will.

Semester almost over...

The semester is almost over and I hope I can make it through with decent grades. It scares me to think that I'm not going to pass my classes. I have been getting the work done so I hope that will count for something. I think I have been doing pretty good keeping up with completing work this semester. The one thing I know I screwed up on was the one midterm I had to take and it was an open book test but of course I never had the book for the class. It sucks being broke. If only I could have received more financial aid I could have the books I need and I still owe money for the semester and have no idea how I'm going to pay it. So I can't register for any classes for next semester I guess until I can talk to the bursar. It's so frustrating. I just wish I knew of a way to get money to pay for the rest of what I owe. I have a part time job but there is no way that is going to help. I tried so hard to get a loan to help but I can't take out a loan without a cosigner and I don't have one of those. I feel so screwed. I have been applying to work from home jobs since the semester started three months ago and haven't heard anything about starting one. I can honestly say I do not know how I am going to get the money I need. I wish I knew who to talk to, where I can find some help. I just can't believe people just let students struggle without offering any help. I can't apply for scholarships because my GPA is too low. I really don't know what I am going to do unless a miracle comes my way in the next couple of weeks. I pray that everything works out. I don't want to have to stop going to school especially when I am almost done. I just hope everything works out in the end.