Last post for the year..

I can't believe today is the last day of 2019. This year hasn't been all too bad. I wonder what next year holds. I hope 2020 will be a good year. I'm going to work on trying to be healthier, save money, volunteer more, read more, get closer to finishing school, and if I'm lucky I might meet the love of my life. All I want is to find a man who is as interested in me as I am with him, someone who can get me out the house and have some fun every once and a while. I am such a homebody. All I do is go to work and come home. It would be nice to have a little excitement going on in my life. We'll see how 2020 works out when the end of it comes around. Will things still be the same for me or will a change happen? We'll see what happens...

Figured it out...

I think I have my school situation figured out. I'm going to have to miss out on this Spring semester but that will take me from three to two semesters until graduation. I think the best thing to do is to relax and enjoy this semester off. Finish paying the semester off and get back in to classes in the Summer. I'm planning on taking three classes this Summer and hopefully I'll pass then I will have three classes left to take for both the Fall and Spring semester as well as the internship then I should be graduating that is if I don't fall behind financially again or have to retake any classes. So I should still be on track with graduating next Spring. I'm nervous and anxious. I am ready to be done.

New Year goals...

Since the New Year will be here soon. There are two goals I want to accomplish in the New Year. One is to start volunteering more. I think I only volunteered once this year and I think it is because I didn't know where to volunteer but luckily on my school site they have a list of places to volunteer and I have found two places that I am interested in volunteering at so my goal is to try and volunteer once or twice a month depending on how much PTO I have that I can use. The second goal is to read more books. I am always so busy or tired that its been awhile since i have had time to read but since school has been out and I can read books for free through the library app on my phone, I have read two books so far in the past week and I am on my third. I forgot how nice it is to relax and read a book. Hopefully I can continue to do it but who knows if I have to miss out on this school semester I will have plenty of time to read.

Year almost over...

The year is almost over. Christmas has come and gone and it will be 2020 next week. I made it another year without getting a boyfriend. It's still hard to believe that I have been single for 6 1/2 years. Every time a new year comes around I always hope that it will be the year that someone finally comes into my life then the end of the year comes without it happening then I say we'll see what happens next year. Maybe 2020 will be my year or I will be saying this exact same thing this time next year.

I made it through the Fall semester. A B, C and C+. I wish I was one of those people who could get straight As but I'm just glad I passed the classes one of them especially since this was my 4th time taking it and this time I had a different teacher than the other three times so I'm convinced the teacher was the problem. I only have three semesters to go then I can finally graduate. I'm so close to being done but I think I'm going to have to sit out this Spring semester because I was unable to finish paying for the rest of the semester. I still owe $2,000+ dollars and if I can't pay I can't register for the semester. I have tried since the semester started to get the money but have had no luck and I don't know what to do. I'm trying to figure out my classes if I have to skip this semester and I am stumped. I am having a hard time figuring out how its going to work. I just wish I could find a way to get this money and not derail my plans. I have tried numerous times to get a loan but no one will give me one. I have tried to get a job which I did get a part time job but I'm not getting paid enough to pay off $2,000 but I'm still looking for another job. I literally have no idea what to do. I feel like every time I try to take 2 steps forward I have to take 10 steps back. I need a miracle to happen but I don't think it will.

Semester almost over...

The semester is almost over and I hope I can make it through with decent grades. It scares me to think that I'm not going to pass my classes. I have been getting the work done so I hope that will count for something. I think I have been doing pretty good keeping up with completing work this semester. The one thing I know I screwed up on was the one midterm I had to take and it was an open book test but of course I never had the book for the class. It sucks being broke. If only I could have received more financial aid I could have the books I need and I still owe money for the semester and have no idea how I'm going to pay it. So I can't register for any classes for next semester I guess until I can talk to the bursar. It's so frustrating. I just wish I knew of a way to get money to pay for the rest of what I owe. I have a part time job but there is no way that is going to help. I tried so hard to get a loan to help but I can't take out a loan without a cosigner and I don't have one of those. I feel so screwed. I have been applying to work from home jobs since the semester started three months ago and haven't heard anything about starting one. I can honestly say I do not know how I am going to get the money I need. I wish I knew who to talk to, where I can find some help. I just can't believe people just let students struggle without offering any help. I can't apply for scholarships because my GPA is too low. I really don't know what I am going to do unless a miracle comes my way in the next couple of weeks. I pray that everything works out. I don't want to have to stop going to school especially when I am almost done. I just hope everything works out in the end.

This is crazy...

So today I just found out that the guy I like is having a baby. I don't know why I always like the wrong guy. All I know is he wasn't the right guy for me anyway and I feel sorry for the girl he is having the baby with. I assume its his girlfriend and he has been doing nothing but cheating on her so better off her than me in that situation. I always feel like I only meet guys who are cheaters. When is the guy who is meant for me ever going to come into my life? It has been over six years and I am still single. I honestly do not think I will meet anyone let alone a good guy. There was this one guy I met through the facebook dating thing and he seemed cool but every time I try to message him he barely responds and a conversation never gets started. The irony is he always posts stuff about women not initiating conversations. I try and get ignored. The way things have been going I don't think I will ever find anyone. I don't know where all the good men are but in my experience all men are cheaters. Every time I see someone get engaged or married, I always wonder why that can't be me or is it ever going to be me. As much as I would love to have a man in my life, sometimes I think I am better off alone.

Jobs...

Who knew finding a part time job had to be so hard? I have been trying to find a part time job for months so that I can bring some extra money in and it seems like it is impossible. I really wanted to get a job in healthcare working part time nights but that has been a struggle because I have applied but never hear back. I was able to get on at a warehouse part time which is cool but hopefully I am able to get someone to help with my kids when I want to work once I start. I think it is a cool job because I will be able to work when I want and there isn't a set schedule. I start training next week and I am ready to start but I still wish I could get that part time night job. I'm not going to stop trying but it seems like you can never get the jobs you want.

I am slowly getting a Youtube channel started for my kids. It is going to be a channel on them playing board games for kids and going out to kid friendly places and events around the city. I think I will be in business wants I figure out how to edit videos. I also am going to add mystery boxes for them to open and review. Once I get the first videos up, I will create an email and an Instagram page for the channel.  I hope it will turn into a success. With all the different channels on there that I have seen, I hope we will be able to get millions of viewers and subscribers but I know it will take a long time to get it. We'll see how things go, between work and school, I hope I can find time to edit videos.