One of my fav. movies...

One of my favorite movies that came on the other day is You've Got Mail with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. I always try to watch it when it comes on tv. It just seems so crazy how times have changed. With the internet and getting on the computer. In the movie, they use AOL and dial up. That's what we use to do when I was a kid. I miss those days. I'm glad we don't have to use dial up anymore because it was get on the internet or keep the phone line free. You couldn't be on the internet and receive phone calls at the same time and everyone didn't have cell phones back then like everyone does now. Everyone had landlines. The one thing I do miss about AOL is the chat rooms. They had all kinds of chat rooms you could go to now I don't even know how to find a chat room. Its like there are none anymore.

Friendless me.....

It sucks I know but I totally have no friends. I have one friend that I text on the phone every now and again but we don't hang out. I need friends to hang out with. I literally have no one. No one to go out to eat with or out to stores or something. How did my life get this way? I am the nicest person. You would think I have all these friends but no, no one. I had one friend who I met my first year in college. We were just starting to become close again while I was pregnant and the cool thing is we were pregnant together so we were going through it all together. I thought everything was going to be cool. We both had daughters and they were exactly a month apart born on the same day. Our daughters were suppose to best friends and grow up together. But sadly, she was killed while at a memorial for someone. I was shocked finding out while I was at work. I never lost anyone in that way before and it still hurts me to this day because I was with her the day before it happened. I will always be thankful to the LORD that I was able to see her before she left us. If I have another daughter one day I plan on naming her after her. I just really hate it that I don't have any friends. The only friend I really have is my boyfriend and we aren't even that close now and days hopefully that will change soon. Maybe one day I will actually start having friends, people to talk to on the phone. maybe go out to places with. It sucks being alone all the time I feel like I am always in the house with no where to go or be.

Puppy love....

A week ago, my boyfriend brought a puppy home. It seems crazy I have never had a dog before so its just weird to me but I can honestly say I love this dog. Its like another baby. I named her Shelly which is cool I get to name her what I wanted. I never expected to have a dog but I have said it years ago that if I had a dog I would name her Shelly because that's the nickname my sister would call me and I like the name Shelly Burger. If you are not familiar with music history, Shelly Burger was the Temptations former manager. I always thought it was funny a man being named Shelly Burger but I always liked it. I'm not sure what breed she is I will have to find out but it seems cool so far to have a dog. We want her to be a house dog so far so good. We'll see how things go with 2 kids in the house now....

I did it again.....

Hello, Looks like I did it again. Its been well over a year since I have been on here and posted. Well my daughter is officially 15 months today! Time sure does fly! I think in a year or so I will be ready for number 2. I just hope its another girl. However many kids I have I want all girls. Nothing against boys but I prefer girls. Especially with the experience I have had with my boyfriends son, I don't think I can handle a boy if he turns out to be like him. Anyway, I am STILL at my job that I have been at for over 3 1/2 years now. I am proud of myself that I have made it this long but I am actively searching for something better. I would like to get me some kind of administrative job somewhere. Preferably in a medical setting. I try my best to get on the computer when I can and look. Sometimes its not easy when most of the jobs it seems like you can do you don't qualify for because of experience. I'm sure a lot of people go through this when job hunting. How can I get experience when all the jobs say you have to have experience? Lord knows I'm trying to find a better opportunity for myself. The job I am at now is a dead end. I have been there almost 4 years and I feel its time to go. I deserve a job with better pay. I hate having to struggle check to check especially when its rent paying time all my money is gone. My boyfriend and I would love to get a house one day but I need to clean my credit report up before I can get a loan and start looking. I can't do that when I never have any extra money. The main reasons I am ready to leave my job is I want more money and I am in the low pay grade in my department. Everybody in my department makes more than I do and I am not exaggerating. Every single person that works in my department makes more than I do even the new people coming in start off making more than I do and its not fair. I feel like I work just as hard if not harder than most of the people up there. Everyday I go in there its like a slap in the face. Its not like I can quit. If a better opportunity would come along I would be out of there fast. Another reason is I want a Monday-Friday job I hate working weekends. I would be happy with a job that is no weekends and no holidays. And I need something that starts at 7 or 8 am. Right now, I am at work at 4 in the morning and have to depend on someone taking my daughter to daycare I want to be able to take her and pick her up and be home with her on the weekends. Its hard but I pray some of these jobs I apply to will start calling me in for interviews soon. I am ready to go.

Here I am...

Hey!! I haven't been on here in almost a year. Time to update!! Well I am still at my job that I have been trying to leave but I figure I'm fine with being up there for now. I am proud to say that as of today, I have been at my job for 2 1/2 years! That is the longest that I have been at any job so I am darn proud of myself. On March 13th, I had my baby! A little girl we named Khloe. She will be 3 months on the 13th and I'm so thankful to have her in my life. I'm so happy to finally be a mom. It's the best and something I have wanted for a long time. I am 25 years old right now so I'm glad I'm starting on kids now, I would hate to have to wait any longer. There are sometimes where it can be hard but I wouldn't trade it for anything. At the end of next month, I will be moving to a 2 bedroom apartment and I can not wait. With Khloe here now, its time for more space and I am excited. The place that I am moving to has just been completely renovated and everything over there is brand new. I am so ready to leave the apartments I am at now. They are so small and cramped and I hate that there are so many ducks over there. Its horrible! Its duck poop everywhere. Once I move I won't have to deal with it anymore. Its gonna be a little sad to move. I have been at the apartments I am at for 2 years now but I am ready to go and have a fresh start somewhere else. I am having trouble with school right now. I lost my financial aid so I put in a financial aid appeal with the school hoping to get my financial aid back so I could take classes this summer but the appeal was denied and I was unable to take my classes. There was no way I could pay for classes out of pocket. Between having to pay bills, pay rent for the apartment I am at now and pay for the apartment I am going to next month I just couldn't afford it right now. But I am hoping to be able to go back in the fall. I am going to have to pay for it out of pocket which sucks but I want to be able to finish my degree and graduate. I just have to get myself back up to a 2.0 then I should be able to get my financial aid back hopefully. I'm also trying to get me a part time job in a hotel some where. I look online all the time trying to find things I can apply to. I feel like I have applied to so many jobs and can't get an interview or anything but I will keep trying. well I think that is all for now. I seriously can not believe I haven't been on here in almost a year. I hope to not have that happen again. So until next time....See ya!!

Hoping for a good thing....

Hello!

Just sitting here waiting to go to work unfortunately. My job so sucks I am ready for a new one. I hate going up there. Its hard wanting to get up to go to a job you hate but my only motivation is money because without it I would be no where right now. Plus I hate depending on others to take care of me. I want to be able to take care of myself. I really feel like its time for a fresh start somewhere else. I don't think my boss really likes me and he told me the other day that I should of been fired but he didn't want to deal with the paperwork. So I took that as my cue to move on before I do end up getting fired and I need all the money I can get now. I'm already not making much up there as it is. So right now, I am hoping that I can get transfered to another hospital. I have already applied to it and I called the HR department to see what I needed to do. The guy told me I needed to get in touch with the manager at the hospital I am trying to go to but I didn't know since its a brand new hospital that hasn't been opened yet. Come to find out the hiring manager is my old boss who hired me for the job I am at now. I sent him an email about wanting to transfer to that one which would allow me to be in a new position too, which also means more money. He said interviews are starting next week and that he would let me know. I'm praying that he doesn't forget about me. I am so nervous you do not understand how much I want this job. I want it more than anything right now. I am hoping that I have a good chance in getting it since I have already been in the department for over a year in a half now. Still, it doesn't mean that I will end up getting it. I am trying my best to think positively but it still scares me because I want this job so much and I am so ready to get away from the job I am at. It is so annoying having to go to a job where I do the same thing every day with no variety. I want to be able to know how to do everything in my department not just one thing and my bosses are not giving me the opportunity to be able to do that. Even though they are letting others in my department. So I feel if I can't do more there I should go somewhere else where I will be able to do more than just one thing all day every day. Plus the fact that I am making less money than everyone in my department is definately unfair to me and considering I'm not going be trying to take care of just me but a baby soon is all the more reason for another job. I already realized I can barely take care of myself with the little bit of money I make every two weeks let alone a baby. So I am really praying that everything works out for the best. That's all I can do is think positively, pray, and hope for a good thing.

Guess what!....

Officially on Monday I found out I am pregnant!! I still can't believe it. Its so surreal. It didn't take as long as I thought it would. My boyfriend is excited as well as I. I just hope everything goes well and I have a healthy baby. I can't wait until he or she gets here. I am due in March and that is a long way away. I am only 4 weeks and 1 day right now so its a ways to go. I can't wait for my first doctor's appointment. Its not until August 15th which is a month from now. I hope the time goes by fast. I don't think I will actually feel pregnant until I go and see the ultrasound and hear the heartbeat. So far I haven't had much problems like throwing up or anything. I think the only thing I have is that I am tired but I was always tired before I got pregnant. I just hope I don't have bad morning sickness. I hope to keep up with this blog so I can discuss my changes and what I'm going through every week.